My Little Man

Joshua was diagnosed with Autism months ago. It is an understatement to say that we were hit extremely hard by this diagnosis. It was a hard time, but one that drove us into the arms of our Lord. We came to terms with Autism being a part of our family. We did a ton of research and changed our diets and lives dramatically. Then we put Autism on the top shelf and went on with our summer. We could not do much until our paperwork was moved through the system and the school year started again. We focused on working with his speech and coping techniques and lived our lives...our new normal. It became comfortable, we seemed to have moved on. And then it was time to face it all full on once again. In all honesty, he has made huge progress in his speech and communication skills. I was hoping that because of those improvements, the school district would kick us out of the program. Well, they did not. In fact, the evaluator, while she agreed that it is great to see such progress, still saw several reasons to move him on in the Special Needs program. So, he will be moved on to be more closely evaluated by the school's Physcologist, Occupational therapist, and Speech therapist to determine with us what will be the best course of treatment for him. There are many options available, ranging from therapists coming to our house, much like they did when he was younger. The next step is to take him in to the school for whatever therapy schedule we all agree on. The final step would be for Josh to enter the school's Preschool program for Special needs children. It was humbling to face the fact that Josh still holds this label. I was so sad that others will look at him and not see past the Autism. And then I realized that is exactly what I was doing. I am working hard on stopping this. Josh may be Autistic, but it does not stop there. He is also Joshua, the boy that no one who comes into contact with can help but love. The boy whose smile is capable of melting this mama right into a puddle on the floor. The boy who is every single day making progress. The one who now comes to me, holds my hand, and tells me that he loves me. The one who is trying his best to tell a knock knock joke. I am such a lucky mama. I really don't care that he is Autistic, he IS Joshua. I love my boy and I am willing to go down this road with him, to hear hard words for any mom to hear. It has taken a long time to put away the picture that I once saw when I heard the word Autism. However, now when I hear the word Autism, I see my Joshua and it becomes a lot easier to handle it.